Ugly things…

  1. The naked mole rat.
  2. mole rat  Typically, when I see things this hideous, I end up feeling sorry for them and thinking they’re kind of cute.  Not so here.  This thing is just scary…a blind penis with legs will never be cute.

  3. Flavor Flav
  4. Flavor Flav  The sight of this man makes vomit involuntarily shoot into my mouth.  The fact that women (if they can really be called that) fight over him on national television makes me wish I was a man. 

  5. Jelly shoes

    jellyshoesI was shocked to see these hideous things at Target the other day…are they honestly coming back in fashion? Yes, I had a pair in every color of the rainbow when I was about 8, but I was a child, so I should be forgiven. Who thought it was a good idea to bring them back??? Not only are they hideous, but they make your feet sweat and stink to high hell…and they get really hot if you leave them in the sun. I remember that from days at the pool as a kid…it was almost more comfortable to walk across the asphalt bare-footed than put on those things. Drama thought they were “beautiful…like glass slippers,” but that girl will not be getting a pair. Call me a mean mommy all ya want, baby girl…you’ll thank me for it later.

  6. Mullets
  7. mullets  Enough said. A woman came into work today for an intake, and thank goodness I was not on the case because there is no wayI could’ve made it through an hour with her without telling her that her hair was f’in disgusting.

  8. Refried Beans
  9. Refried Black Beans Honestly…this looks like diarrhea on a plate…with a sprig of some herb on top to make it look like food. The only thing worse than refried beans is watching someone eat refried beans.

  10. Rat tails
  11. sweet rat tail  There is no excuse for thinking this is cool. When we lived in Hawaii, it was unbelievable how many kids…young kids…like 5 or 6 years old…had these. Perhaps (and I am cringing when I say this) if a kid decides on their own accord that they’d like to have one it’s one thing, but there is no way that an 18 inch rat tail was their choice. That shit took years to grow, which means that the parents decided it would be cool, which means that someone needs to call CPS.

  12. Ostriches
  13. ostrich  I’m not sure if these really belong on the “ugly” list but they absolutely belong on the “scary ass animals that serve no purpose and should be eliminated” list.  OK…I guess they belong on both.  There is no need for a fucking bird to look like this.  Especially a six-foot tall bird that can’t fly but can outrun a human.  These fuckers are mean…I have been harassed by every one I’ve encountered (and I’ve encountered quite a few).  I love animals, but these things can go at any time. 

  14. Gingivitis

    bad teeth OK…I understand dentist anxiety. I didn’t go to the dentist for nearly 7 years…believe me…I understand. But there is NO reason to let this shit happen to you.

  15. Cauliflower ear
    cauliflower earI have watched enough UFC with Snoop to know that this is fairly common among fighters from getting hit in the ear too many times. And maybe there are other reasons why this might happen, and if there’s a disease that causes it…I’m sorry. It’s fucking nasty.  
  16. Neck rings
    Photobucket I have been freaked out by these ever since I was a tiny kid looking through my mom’s National Geographic library. I am all for ethnic traditions and shit, but what the hell is this all about? Maybe it’s “pretty” while it’s on, but it can’t be comfy. And the fact that if they’d remove the rings their neck would collapse just freaks. me. out.                                           
  17. Taco bell guy-girl
    taco bellI can’t post a picture of this, because it’s a somewhat sensitive and very un-PC thing. But my BFFLMNOP understands and is laughing her ass off right now. If you must know, email me and perhaps I’ll clue you in. But believe me…it wasn’t cute.
  18. Dreadlocks on white girls
     Dreadlocks.  Who the hell thinks this is hot?!? And don’t answer potheads, because I have been a pothead, and I never thought this was hot. What makes it worse is that the girls who sport this look typically smell really really bad, too. That nasty I-haven’t-showered-in-weeks-or-washed-my-hair-in-longer-so-i-bathe-in-patchouli-oil-instead stench. It’s awful. And flattering to no one.
  19. Grillz
    grill.  I don’t get it. Not at all. I’m not even really sure what else to say.

I have so many other things that my judgemental observant mind thinks about, but I’m way too tired to look up pics right now and someone I know is waiting for this post so I’ll leave it at this.  Updates will follow as I feel necessary.


11 Responses

  1. your bflmnop agrees 100%

  2. WHAT? Drama can’t have jelly shoes? Come on Mommy. They’re back and badder than ever. You can get them at Target this time around. When we were kids it was “Cheap Charlies” baby.

    Refried beans are GOOOOOOOD!!!! mmmmmmm

    Rat Tails….cough, cough…ah-hem…yeah, I had one in 3rd grade

    Awesome post babe. Update it tomorrow to give me something else to do.

  3. EWWW, EWWWW, and EWWWWWWWW! And AMEN! to #2…

  4. Yuckity yuck yuck yuck. I had a mullet once… I should dig that puppy up….

  5. I agree almost 100%, but…..refried beans? One of my favorite foods. This is really a shame. I’m going to serve you up a bowl alongside a pile of mashed potatoes.

  6. Can you update this to add (1) tight sweatpants on men (NUT HUGGERS) and (2) women with tight spandex showing camel toe, a/k/a moose knuckles.


  7. Okay, you are a mean mommy. Jelly shoes are so much fun! I say get her the jellies! Also, I can show you TWO white girls with dreds who are actually quite beautiful. They are girls who work at Phase. If you really wanna see them they are on my myspace. We can talk about this later. Oh, and believe it or not, the neck won’t just flop around when you take the rings off b/c putting those things on actually doesn’t do anything to the neck. It totally compresses (read RUINS) your collarbone and rib cages, making it APPEAR that your neck is longer, when in fact, your torso is just squashed. How bout them apples? ;p

  8. See…I knew that about the necks, but I still thought their neck muscles were weak from not having to work for so long, so when the rings are removed they DO have trouble holding their heads up, because the muscles have atrophied. I like my apples the best.

  9. Take it easy eh. There is no hairstyle hotter for girls than dreads man. They are sexy enough to bring a sub-par girl up to bang-able level. Im a pot head and I have dreads, but I thought this way long before I was either. To each his own.

  10. Dreadlocks on women is the sexiest thing ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  11. Amen to everything BUT #4 I love that dude! no matter what his hair syle. That bird lookin thing is FUGLY! what the F is it anyways

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