Dear Wine,

I know I don’t need to tell you how much I love you.  You are a consistent force in my life, and always there when I need you.  When I have a bad day, you are always there to lift my spirits and make me forget about my problems.  And there is no one more ready to celebrate a good day than you.  You’re my ever faithful companion, and for this…I thank you.  But I’ve had some time to think since we last saw each other (last night) and I think it’s best for you and I to take some time apart.  Please don’t be hurt by this.  It’s not that I don’t love you…trust me, I do.  It’s just that I have a house that needs cleaned, laundry that needs washed, and a fat ass that needs to shrink.  Like any best friends, you and I can sit on the porch together and let time slip away.  But when I wake in the morning to my messy house and dirty dishes…when my son doesn’t have clean underwear because I was holding you all night instead of doing the laundry…when I remember the treadmill waiting for me upstairs gathering dust… These are the times that make me think perhaps our relationship isn’t as healthy as it seems.  Please don’t be hurt when I walk by you in the aisle this week.  It’s not you, it’s me.  Believe me, this separation will be harder for me than you…there are lots of other people who can take you home and give you the attention you deserve.  Hopefully I can get the rest of my life in order, so that you and I can find our way back to one another. Until then, I’ll leave you with the lyrics of Chicago…

“When you see me walking by…and the tears are in my eyes…look away, baby…look away.”

I’ll miss you, dear friend.

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6 Responses

  1. Good old Chicago…they’ve always got great break up/hearbreak songs for just these kinds of moments. :0)

  2. And here I’ve been considering upping my weekly buying from one bottle to two! I’m blaming Blog Hopping.

    Blog Hoppin’,
    Balancing Hops

  3. I’m feeling a similar break needs to be made by myself with my friend alcohol as well. As pleasant as it is to anesthesize myself, the intensified depression of feelings forced out by the bottle that exacerbates my sadness the next day leads me to believe that it is in fact, for the best. Weep not for the memories… ;p

  4. I’ll find it a good home. Mine. You’re in good hands, wine.

  5. My vote is we say fuck beer, because it makes my belly too big….. fuck wine, because you drink too much of it……
    I guess that just leaves us with Vodka. Just like that with my amazingly simple logic it is decided. We now get sloshed on Vodka. WWWOOOOHHOOOO!!!!!! Stock up baby, cause Snoop-a-loop is coming home!

  6. well…i hope that speech worked better on the wine than it ever did on me or those i wished to drop!!!! it’s not you…it’s me…..stay strong my tough 5k momma!

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